Have you ever read a text or email and had an ‘out-of-body’ experience?
As the saying goes, “It’s not what you say, but how you say it.”
Sometimes miscommunication occurs when we’re in a specific mood and we’re not ready to receive the message.
Other times miscommunication occurs when the recipient of the message harbours specific thoughts and feeling about the sender —or harbours insecurities —which leads to misinterpretations of a well-intentioned message.
So what happens?
A recipient may read the message to others and place tone on specific words—all the while getting themselves worked up in the process.
They may then proceed to arm themselves with ‘caps lock’ and exclamation marks aplenty—ready to engage in an all-out, rage-fuelled, text or email fight.
…sometimes the message is sent with good intentions…
Yes, there are times when a sender’s intention is to ‘pack a punch’ with a message—but sometimes the message is sent with good intentions and we are not ‘in a place’ to receive it.
A few weeks ago I read a post online and was completely irritated by it. The following day I re-read the post and it had taken on a different meaning.
So what had transpired?
I wasn’t in the frame of mind to receive the message in the way that it was intended. In fact, at the time of reading the post the previous day, I was hungry and tired—and we all know that isn’t a good combination.
Hungry + Tired = Irritable!
This is why when we receive messages which evoke unwanted feelings within us, we should do our best not to respond straight away. Recognise your feelings in that moment and gather your thoughts. Sleep on it if you have to and then revisit the message with ‘fresh eyes’ when you’re in a different frame of mind.
…not all conversations are text message or email appropriate…
A certain telecoms company had a slogan, ‘It’s good to talk.’ It’s true. Many a relationship and friendship has been jeopardised over a text message, and not all conversations are text message or email appropriate.
Perhaps we need to leave the text messaging for simple messages such as, “I’m on my way, see you in 15 minutes” and pick up the phone to avoid any miscommunication.
What about you? Have you experienced any of the above? What was the outcome and how did you deal with it? Let me know in the comments!
Aisha A. Phipps
Musings of Ms. Phipps
© Musings Of Ms Phipps and Aisha Phipps (www.msphipps.co.uk) 2019. Unauthorised use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this author and/or owner is strictly prohibited.
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